-$163.53 in my checking account today

After my car being in the shop…huuuu…several fucking times and not having the money to pay shit, I finally hit the point I haven’t been at in years…

Cable almost turned off.
Cell did get turned off…I have to endorse t-mobile they really like the poor. They helped me out.
GWP almost got turned off 3 weeks ago.
Gas almost got turned off.
I don’t even want to look through my mail.

This is called being “in the shit house.”

I cashed in my 401K, which isn’t that much…just enough to save my ass and hopefully enough for someone that claims they are a mechanic to find out what the FUCK is wrong with my car. If I get stranded one more time, I think I might lose my mind.

I’m starting to give up and I don’t like that…but it’s happening.

I have to buck it up…my sister will be here on Friday.

I look at my house and I just think…well…she won’t be able to stand it for more than 10 minutes.

There is only so much lipstick you can put on a pig to try and make it look pruty.

Poor people are a hoot huh?

Sometimes my life can be sheer crap…

But I know around the corner sometimes something makes it better.

My sister got invited to the Dog Whisper reunion party and I’m going with her.

She’ll be here next weekend.

I can’t wait…I’m so fucking excited!

Fridge poetry...

I'm doing this on a Friday night...pathetic. I hate my life sometimes.

Kill…kill…kill…kill…ahh…ahh…ahh…ahh…

I felt as if it was my own, personal laundry mat.

Not one person, besides me.

It was kind of creepy.

I liked it.

I just noticed...

When I was turning off the lights tonight...

I still tippie toe though the house after almost three years of him gone.

It's amazing how long a mental mind fuck lasts.

I'm still trying to walk on egg shells.

By the by...car...$382.65. Fucking fuel pump.

I'm broke, depressed and that's only the beginning.

Maybe tomorrow will be better.

I always did like fairy tales.

I had to laugh…it couldn’t happen again…

Not after I just picked the monster up from the replacement of the second timing belt.

As I was driving, I thought how amazing my car was running.

Smooth…perfect.

India, don’t be stupid…

The dashboard lit up like it was a fucking Christmas tree…and shit hitting the fan ensued. Or at least it sounded like it.

Pulled over and called my best friends…AAA and Pep Boys.

I would have taken, yet another tow truck picture but even I have grown tired of them.

It’s not me having a shitty car, this is someone not knowing how to fix my car.

As I said, it’s laughable at this point.

I’d lose my mind if I didn’t find, at least some humor in it.

Once again...

Saturday morning, I was up at 7am.

Why?

Can you fucking guess?

This part is not supposed to be in the timing belt chamber…but it was. Hence my car not starting, like it should.

I knew something was wrong with it. It just wouldn’t start sometimes and I took it back weekend before last.

The “Mechanics” cleared it.

“We don’t see a problem, India.”

Well…now you have a serious problem.

Today at “Pep Boys” was…

Me losing my mind.

You can push me, shove me, beat me and push me again. Once I hit that breaking point…you’re fucked.

Key…ignition…start…simple.

The one fucking thing that I could have not spent $500 on was the one thing that almost blew my engine.

Timing belt. The water pump incident of 2007 called for a new timing belt. This is a good choice on a normal realm. I am not normal realm…obviously.

They fucked up, basically.

And I’m fucking pissed, basically.

Why ask why…fix my fuckinggodamnmotherfuckingcar.

Now.

FUCK…FUCKFUCKFUCK…FUCK!

Better...