Now it's .17 cents in my bank account...

Life sucks when you're having fun.

I can't believe I only have 17 cents to my name BUT my Ma sent me fabulous things for school! I think she wants me to be an artist more than a chef. I kind of agree with her but art doesn't pay. She sent me paint brushes, paint, pastels, charcoal and these amazing markers that change colors. She also sent me a backpack a water bottle with skulls on it and a sketch pad.

I was born to be an artist...you don't have to be smart to paint. You don't have to be smart to create...which actually makes me brilliant because I can create what most people can't.

I can't spell or do math, in the modern world that makes me stupid.

I keep hearing him..."You stupid bitch, you can't draw to save you life."

In my head I thought "I can draw your chalk line, die motherfucker...die, or please just kill me."

I wished for him to die because he was killing me and he still is.

His birthday is the 28th, why do I feel that he's going to call me on HIS birthday.

This never goes away. Domestic Violence never goes away. It distracts me. Always watch your back, ALWAYS. PTSD.

I've been through the goddamn war now I want to learn.

I guess I just need to buck it up...again.