Laundry and my right to say fuck as many times as I want
Hate it….hate it….hate it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!...laundry that is…not the word fuck.
I love having clean clothes but not toting it to the wash-o-mat. It’s hot and sweaty in there even on the coldest day of the year. Not to mention the fact that you are using a washer and dryer that you don’t even KNOW what’s been in there. Ever notice how depressing the laundry mat is? Uh huh. By the way for those of you that have a washer and dryer….I, hate you all. Sorry but true. Just in the land o’ laundry kind of way.
Three scenarios at the fucking laundry mat
1) Couples arguing because the man doesn’t want to be there and the woman made him go because she thinks it’s not fair or feels like a maid doing it by herself.
2) The woman is there alone and the man is at home and you know he’s got a fucking beer in his fucking hand and he’s watching some form of fucking sport while she’s slaving away and yelling at her children washing his dirty boxers (I can’t even think of doing that and washing tightie whities…spousal abuse is what that is).
3) The lonely person like me….well not lonely but alone.
And after what I just described I guess I’m the luckiest in the 3. (I use to be #1 then slowly moved to #3 cause I was tired of fighting)
To top it all off!!!! There was a person there doing laundry that was driving a Hummer! Now what the FUCK are you doing going to a laundry mat in that kind of car. Don’t those things have a fucking W/D in the back or something???? They’re fucking big enough. If you can afford that shit you can afford a W/D right? Guess not in LA.
Ok…I admit. I waited too long to do my laundry. It was about 3 weeks worth with a small wash in there for good measure. I was determined to do it tonight and I did. My fault…I know. Once a week….yeah….yeah…yeah….whatever. Oh sorry, fucking whatever.
However, I do not understand even if I had a small amount of laundry and wasn’t in such a fowl fucking mood why men think that FIRST of all doing this…..
”Birdie” sound that is so popular here to attract a woman’s attention…kind of like a fast whistling sound… Now is that appropriate when I’m carrying a ton of laundry into the washing placey, thingamajiggy. Sorry getting tired of typing laundry….but not fuck. I mean two guys were like “hey baby…you’re looking sexy”…excuse me? …. Hello???? I’m sorry you little shit you are so attractive and those were such nice comments that I think I will just drop my laundry right here in the parking lot and go with you to an unknown destination never to be heard from again. WTF? Now, do ANY men out there think that this turns a woman on or makes her want to….ummm….date….ummmm…say “hold on while I write my number down you PIG”…..I’m speechless. It baffles me.
Wait if it gets me out of doing laundry….interesting….didn’t think about that at the time…..
I can actually see the head lines….
“Woman disappears while doing laundry……”
Little do the reporters or detectives know that I ran away with some guy I met in the wash-o-mat parking lot and I am currently washing his tightie whities on a rock somewhere in the desert…..fuck…..
I love having clean clothes but not toting it to the wash-o-mat. It’s hot and sweaty in there even on the coldest day of the year. Not to mention the fact that you are using a washer and dryer that you don’t even KNOW what’s been in there. Ever notice how depressing the laundry mat is? Uh huh. By the way for those of you that have a washer and dryer….I, hate you all. Sorry but true. Just in the land o’ laundry kind of way.
Three scenarios at the fucking laundry mat
1) Couples arguing because the man doesn’t want to be there and the woman made him go because she thinks it’s not fair or feels like a maid doing it by herself.
2) The woman is there alone and the man is at home and you know he’s got a fucking beer in his fucking hand and he’s watching some form of fucking sport while she’s slaving away and yelling at her children washing his dirty boxers (I can’t even think of doing that and washing tightie whities…spousal abuse is what that is).
3) The lonely person like me….well not lonely but alone.
And after what I just described I guess I’m the luckiest in the 3. (I use to be #1 then slowly moved to #3 cause I was tired of fighting)
To top it all off!!!! There was a person there doing laundry that was driving a Hummer! Now what the FUCK are you doing going to a laundry mat in that kind of car. Don’t those things have a fucking W/D in the back or something???? They’re fucking big enough. If you can afford that shit you can afford a W/D right? Guess not in LA.
Ok…I admit. I waited too long to do my laundry. It was about 3 weeks worth with a small wash in there for good measure. I was determined to do it tonight and I did. My fault…I know. Once a week….yeah….yeah…yeah….whatever. Oh sorry, fucking whatever.
However, I do not understand even if I had a small amount of laundry and wasn’t in such a fowl fucking mood why men think that FIRST of all doing this…..
”Birdie” sound that is so popular here to attract a woman’s attention…kind of like a fast whistling sound… Now is that appropriate when I’m carrying a ton of laundry into the washing placey, thingamajiggy. Sorry getting tired of typing laundry….but not fuck. I mean two guys were like “hey baby…you’re looking sexy”…excuse me? …. Hello???? I’m sorry you little shit you are so attractive and those were such nice comments that I think I will just drop my laundry right here in the parking lot and go with you to an unknown destination never to be heard from again. WTF? Now, do ANY men out there think that this turns a woman on or makes her want to….ummm….date….ummmm…say “hold on while I write my number down you PIG”…..I’m speechless. It baffles me.
Wait if it gets me out of doing laundry….interesting….didn’t think about that at the time…..
I can actually see the head lines….
“Woman disappears while doing laundry……”
Little do the reporters or detectives know that I ran away with some guy I met in the wash-o-mat parking lot and I am currently washing his tightie whities on a rock somewhere in the desert…..fuck…..
posted by iamfallingfromgrace at 11:53 PM
2 Comments:
dammit, now i have to go do laundry.
because i pissed myself laughing while reading this.
because it's all too fucking true -- all of it!
(and yes, it's another night with insomnia for me. woo hoo!)
don't you just love guys that do that?? doesn't it make you feel great? no, it doesn't does it.
i love your laundry stories.
Post a Comment
<< Home