Hate me today….

I’ve tried to write this post so many times….now it only makes sense to me….

I’m never at a loss for words…tonight is different.

What I want to say is…why isn’t everything simple?

I want to walk up to someone and say “Don’t you get it? Don’t you understand? Didn’t I do enough? Didn’t I try enough? What more do you want?"

I tried. I couldn’t do it. Jesusfuckingchrist when am I going to stop blaming myself?

Probably…about never….

He hates me...he hates me....and I don't understand why...