I've been trying not to talk about him anymore but...

I have to give him credit this time. DD is back in sober living and it’s been almost a month. He called me and asked me for stories that he could use to speak in his meetings. “Shit…what category Vance. I have a whole filling system in my head of these stories. Beer, coke…just being an asshole? Hangovers, drugovers? What kind of story you lookin for? I got um all. However, I don’t have any that you can tell your grandparents on Christmas Eve. Our relationship seems to be lacking in those.”

He told me another reason he called was because he was frustrated and needed to talk to someone that understood him the best. That would be me. The second I picked up the phone I knew exactly what he was feeling just by the tone of his voice…and I was right.

It makes me sad that I had to let go of someone that I did know that well. I knew every movement, every expression on his face. I could finish his sentences when he couldn’t find the words and he did was the same with me.

I think it’s sad sometimes that things just didn’t work out the way we thought or dreamt they would. As I’ve said before I will always love him in a weird way and he has said the same to me.

But…

I can honestly say there isn’t a day that goes by that I don't thank my lucky stars that he doesn't live here anymore.

Thank my lucky stars? Who said that? No I'm not from Texas...not at all.